I told a friend tonight who was having some qualms about whether to move out of her place or not that: "whether it's a good experience or a bad experience, you'll learn something about yourself." I can't say often enough how this is my mantra, my slogan, my phrase that gives me pause, my words that ignite me from my bed in the morning.
I've learned that relationships - no matter how long they last or why-ever they stopped - teach you something about yourself. Sometimes it teaches you what you're worth to yourself. Sometimes you learn how much you can stand before you walk away. Sometimes you learn about what morals you have that are non-negotiable. Sometimes you learn spontenaity. Sometimes you learn a few new risque tricks for the boudoir. Sometimes you learn how to accept a compliment. Sometimes you learn how to see through someone else's lies to the core of the matter. And sometimes, because this lesson is particularly hard, you learn when to walk away.
I've been on a dating break for about a month now. It's like I'm taking the time to synthesize all the lessons I've learned over the past few months, and past few (short) relationships, and make them as much a part of me so that I'll be able to carry them into the new year, and hopefully new relationships.
"Whether it's a good experience or a bad experience, you'll learn something about yourself" isn't only about relationships... it's about life. It's about everything. The year 2009 has been about change. I've changed a lot. There were definitely a lot of hurdles early on in the year, but looking back at the hurdles now - they seem pretty small potatoes.